Tribute to my ex-child continues..

20 09 2010

Compared to my first pregnancy, I was very much active during my second pregnancy. I was working as usual, there was no problem, no difficulty in executing any of my daily work, except for taking my three and half year old daughter outside for play. It is truly said that children are usually more attached to their mothers. Though mother has comparatively more responsibilities than father, she does spend much time with her children. Also, yoga and meditation has helped me in bringing deep relationship between me and my daughter.

I had mentioned about developing toxemia during my second pregnancy in my first part. Yeah, during my urine test, doctor has told me that I had albumin in my urine hence in the next visit repeated urine test would be required. But, during the next visit, she examined me and did not suggest going for urine test again. I think my problem would have got worse by that time and doctor was unable to observe that. But, I was happy that everything was going fine. This was my eighth month last week. But, as soon as I entered into ninth month, that incidence happened (I gave stillbirth to my angel). Although everything happens out of God’s will, but He makes someone responsible for any tragedy.  In my case, it is the doctor who was unable to diagnose the problem.  In pain we went to the hospital and we returned home with empty hands taking more pain. No one can feel this pain except those who have undergone this tragedy themselves.

Anyways, I am happy about  that this pregnancy was enjoyable and I could not feel how the time passed. So many yoga and meditation courses happened here besides a satsang and a Rudra pooja. These all events were possible because of that angel only. Me and my husband were surprised that how these many events were happening in such a successful way. I salute to that Goddess who chose me as her abode for eight months and wish her freedom from this samsara. I know that this time will pass and happy moments will come again but still there will be some space in my memory reserved for this beautiful angel.

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